Monday, August 6, 2007

The Live Blog- Barry Bonds 756* Chase

Only so much you can do in Sandy, Utah on a one night stay over. I would blame my work lifestyle but I can not really complain, considering that I get a night alone in a lovely Hampton Inn with a bunch of dancing gypsies outside my window (don't ask...) I will persevere and keep it going, no matter the inning. I will provide not-so-clever insight into the realm of a bored father of three and his hope that the tainted home run chases ends tonight

Who knows, maybe something wacky will be said by our ESPN commentators (Dave O'Brien, Rick Sutcliffe and Erin Andrews) or perhaps your host for this live blog, BUCK ROGERS.....

1102 Dmitri Young appears to hit the winning dinger and circles the bases with one flap UP...opposite of Scarface Leonard..awesome..he should get dotted for it...Go Have Yourself a Pork Chop, Dmitri

1027 have a good feeling about this
1 st pitch, nothing close, slow outside
2nd pitch faster but outside, not close to plate
3rd...................88mph lower outside corner of the plate..B*nds looks hungry
4th pitch...........even lower and more outside...3-1 count
5th pitch and probably a last pitch, B*nds swings from the heels, and misses the best pitch of the night

6th pitch, crowd is in a frenzy and he swings and missess......what do we do now, B*nds was straight struck out by the rookie, Lannan, who is straight dealin'

1025 witnessed a Ray King B*nds man-hug....big brothers right there...Winn is trying to continue the inning, with a runner on 1st...I can see it now, B*nds hits the winning 2 run dinger and all B*nds talks about is the team won due to the dinger....yeah right...he at least he is bumping to Dre and Snoop, Da Next Episode as he rolls up the Plate...word




1017 R Zim does not swing and draws a walk, followed by audio commentary by Erin, nothing visual, boo hiss...out of the inning by Chief Lincecum and B*nds is up 4th in the bottom of the 7th inning, 1-1 still

1008 Pedro Feliz should shave .....and that is saying something for this lazy ass blogger to make that statement

1003 bases loaded for the Nats and the pitcher, Lannan is hitting in a 1-1 game..not so sure about that decision but Manny Acta is the Manager of the Year according to SUT

955 Scott Ostler, local fishhack, is being interviewed by D.O'B and SUT,since Bud Selig is becoming weaker by the moment due to all his traveling and gallivanting, in order to stand up and keep his 10 fingers in his pockets..

953- hitting up, Live Metallica for a free download,



The Older and Sober James Hetfield...so sad
The fun days of Metal

948- the exuberance of the S.F. announcer is poorly understated, this is history here..give me a Barry, Barry, Barry Chant
1st- high outside, B*onds is locked in according to SUT and I happen to agree
2nd low and slow, 2-0 count
3rd pitch grounds into a twin killing ( D. O'Brien's usage of vocab).

next......



944 Alone in a hotel, without the wife...invited the Dancing Gypsies in and well,,Erin comes to my rescue, R-Zim goes down on a fastball that paints the outer black, poor kid is outmatched after being beaned and having the gusto to stay in the game....


923 Erin Andrews, oh Erin is saying something about concentration



918 When a bat goes into the stands, being released by a batter, is lack of Pine Tar to be blamed.....

914 B*nds arrives at the plate with Winn on first base
1st pitch- slow out of the zone curve ball, Bonds takes
2nd pitch- ditto
3rd pitch- ditto ( don't blame him)
4th pitch- high strike, taking all the way
5th pitch- low ball but not all that far off- walk is a walk...
B*nds daughter, Aisha ( misspelled by B*nds, weak) cutaway with some messy scribbling on her cheeks, "PITCH 2 Dad!"......was this written by Kimberly Bell?

912 lame Cal Ripken commercial, he deserves better but followed by a Craig McMurtry sighting

910 R Zim lives ...to ground into a inning ending double play

907 Sut reads B*nds and thinks he will swing very hard at the first pitch baseball..nice prediction

903 the hotel desk chair is uncomfortable, headed to the cumstained sofa...just placed a "clean" sheet before lying down....laptop in tow

859 walk off rbi by the Astros highlight.....Damn Cubbies, blew it again...followed by a "Multi-dimensional Lincecum" comment, and Chief Lincecum goes oppo and singles to left, SUT is happy with the pitcher getting the base knocked...okay this live blog stuff is boring but so is Sandy, Utah on a Monday night

858 Xavier "Nook/Pacifier" Logan just dropped the ball ...boo hiss

856 the first of many to come, RUSH HOUR 3 commercial


852 We are all due for a beautiful Erin Andrews report...get it on it.... as on cue, Erin brings up Nomar and his peripheral vision....and all of the camera-snapping guests at the ballpark..Thanks Erin for your insight and your beauty

847 SUT rips on Durham for having a slow bat...ho hum..but Sut gets a pass for having a brother in Boise, who coaches the local privileged kid Catholic School, Go Bishop Kelly Knights ( my momma's alma mater)...grab some pine, Ray, wait to earn the backwards k ...

845- snore, who cares until another 8 batters,,,, pitch some freakin strikes...my hotel room has become cold, that way I stay awake...and I see Mike Minter retired from the Carolina Panthers...Sail on Minter




843- low strike on the 1st pitch,

a slow out of the zone breaking ball low away brings the count to 1-1.........

89 mph down the middle, must have fooled B*nds

4th pitch and * misses awkwardly and fouls out near the 3b dugout, but R-Zim retaliates and says "screw you Chief Lincecum" and makes the tough running catch..

842- exchange the damn baseballs and give B*nds a pitch to hit

841 wtf, the history is in dount, who called the double steal, the giants are not playing for anything but 756* and they pull this junk, fire Alou or whoever is coaching the Giants nowadays, but oh no, great eye by Winn and now the Walk looks a lil likely



836- Only 4 batters away...yippee...history, tainted history, but history is history..and .....Rajai Davis ( Matt Morris trade bait) draws a walk...getting closer and this base on balls is making it more likely that Bonds will get a pitch to hit..uh oh, two men on when Vizquel ( Jose Mesa pen- pal) nails a 20 foot swinging bunt...wow

832pm Obligatory Offspring shot of B*nds- Nickolai

831- first shot of the Cove in the dirty body of water,,,I pick the guy in the Red Kayak to snag the *ball

827- R-Zim survives Chief "Bob Gibson" Lincecum brutal attack to the head, first HBP all year, yeah right that was not a purpose pitch
8:24- Sutcliffe has lost his freaking mind, naming Manny Acta his Manager of the Year...crack smoker for sure


822pm- M. Ali gave a public message over the Diamondvision...weird

8:20pm B*onds takes the field as the opposing pitcher is allegedly from Long Beach, NY.....Long Beach in the house....
- Dmitri just signed an extension for the NATS- what in the world is he thinking ( Thanking the GM for a taking a chance, I guess)

8:16PM Why are we watching meaningless highlights of other games.....don't they know Barry B*nds is about start...but wait Erin Andrews is on...awesome